Me Vs. Mr. Gopher

Me vs. Mr. Gopher

Well, Mr. Gopher seems to be winning. I haven’t caught a single gopher. I have lots of new holes in my yard, though. I did get one of those sonic things. It beeps every 28 seconds. On Wednesday, Dad and I went to Lowe’s and he and I both got one. $19.95 each. Such a bargain…if it works. Dad has a gopher, too. His showed up about the same time mine did. His driveway circles in front of the house and there is an area in front of it that he has planted lilacs, pine trees, birch trees and flowers. He has bulbs and wildflowers there and he started to water it more lately. Here comes Mr. Gopher! He is happily setting up shop there. Pretty soon he’s going to bring home a wife, have babies and then they will put up the “Santa Stop Here” sign! Where does it all end?

So, Dad and I both got the sonic things and he put mine in before he left on Wednesday. Yesterday morning, I had two new holes on the slope and one next to the fence. He had eaten two gladiolus shoots, about six inches high and the new hole was right next to one of the eaten ones. Little bugger.

I went out yesterday afternoon and discovered that my irises are in bloom. Much more so than the tulips. So far the freesia and irises are doing the best. I have mostly the kind of irises that they put in flower arrangements. Not the big kind. Well, the first to bloom was the typical dark blue, yellow center. Yesterday I found a white with yellow center and a lavender with yellow center. Really pretty! And Mr. Gopher has not touched those. Yeah! Thank heaven for small miracles!

Speaking of miracles, Scott had gotten a ticket a couple of months ago. Running a stop sign and 70 in a 40. Problem is, this time he didn’t do it. He doesn’t run stop signs and he doesn’t go quite that fast. The officer came up behind him with lights flashing, at 4:30am, and Scott speeded up to get over so the maniac behind him flashing his high beams could get by. Well, it was the Sheriff and he pulled him over for speeding. Go figure. So, he paid the fine and pleaded not guilty. His court date was yesterday and we were praying that everything would go well. God listened and the deputy didn’t show up! So the case was dismissed. Yeah! Praise God! We will get the money back and, believe me, it was a lot of money! Thank heaven for big miracles!

So, anyway, we shall see if there is any new gopher activity today. I pulled one of the traps and the other one is still set, but I haven’t caught any gophers. Well, the only good part of that is that I haven’t had to clean out any traps!

Dad hasn’t caught any yet either. He said he set traps, but they haven’t used his either. Well, he was sitting on his front porch yesterday, waiting for UPS to arrive (picture the two old guys from Secondhand Lions – great movie, highly recommend!), when the gopher sticks his head out of the hole! So Dad goes and gets his shotgun and puts some kind of little tiny shot in there and shoots at the gopher. He doesn’t know if he got it or not, but I guess if the gopher doesn’t come back, then he did. So, dad is using the traps, sonic thing and shotgun. I don’t think I put shotgun on my top ten list, but maybe it will end up being up near the top of the list!
See, it is a good thing he lives in the mountains. The city couldn’t handle him! You gotta love a person that goes after a gopher with a shotgun!

My gopher (getting kind of possessive, I know) so far is only interested in destroying my yard. I would love to hire a professional, however, it is not in the budget right now. Unfortunately. I am trying to cut corners everywhere and I can’t spend money to have the little buggers eradicated. Hopefully I don’t regret that one.

The other thing I did on Wednesday was to mow my lawn. I never mowed a lawn before. Dad pulled the spark plug from the lawnmower and it was wet. He held it over the flame on the stove and I guess that dries it out. Well, we got the mower started. Apparently it wasn’t working right when my mother in law had it. They couldn’t get it to stay on. The part that sucks up the grass was blocked and the sparkplug was wet. Anyway, so we got it running and I pushed it around the front yard. It looked so nice! I was so proud of myself! It was hard to do, though. Dad told me at first to go from the bottom of the yard to the top and then we decided side to side would make more sense because it was hard to push from the bottom! Well, I also did the bottom of the slope on the side of the house. That was hard work! I couldn’t do any more. I brought the mower back to the driveway and Dad started the mower up again, I’m not sure why. Well, that is when he realized I hadn’t been holding onto the bar underneath the handle. The one that makes it go forward by itself. I was pushing the entire weight of the mower myself! No wonder I could not also push it sideways on the slope! I sure got my exercise, though! It was much easier to do once he showed me that! Well, I was so tired after mowing that I sat down with a drink and Dad had a beer. I won’t drink the stuff, but it sure seemed like someone ought to have a beer after mowing the lawn. Dad was happy to accommodate me! Good thing he was there!

Can’t wait to see what damage this little guy has caused today. He seems to only work at night. Must be underground during the day. Busy little thing. Go do your digging in someone else’s yard! Can’t you see you aren’t welcome here? Go away! Leave my yard alone. Or I am going to come after your little furry butt!

Oh, yeah and the dried fox urine, apparently they have foxes in cages with a sloped floor and when they urinate, it rolls downhill into this little collection thing and then they bottle it! I guess it crystallizes or something. Thank you, internet!

The dried blood you can get at Lowe's in a like gallon size container. It doesn't say what type of blood it is (type O or AB or just plain old A) or what type of animal it comes from. It does come from Washington State. Really, I am not making this stuff up! Sounds like one of those old gimmicks where the guy sells the elixir from the back of his wagon for like $2 a bottle (such a deal!) and you are stuck with a bottle of stuff that doesn't do anything. What are they called?